One chore I don’t mind doing during the summer is to wash my car. Okay, some of you need to stop laughing, as you recall the caked on road slime streaking down the length of my van. However, when I have a couple of hours free on a hot summer day, I enjoy filling up a bucket of hot, soapy water, grabbing a big sponge, and giving my Mazda and Kia a nice, long overdue scrub down. Sometimes it takes two or three passes to remove the hardened bug goo and tar, but when it’s done, the vehicles sparkle like Mr. Clean’s head. It’s one of those chores, that allows me the opportunity to clear my head, sweat a little, and when completed I have a tangible accomplishment…it’s fulfilling and relaxing.
As my kids have grown, when they saw me pull out the garden hose on a sunny day, they connected water and sun equals fun, and they would ask, “Can I help?” I would pause briefly as their hopeful faces peered upward, and I reluctantly gave in with a begrudging “okay”. With sponges in hand we began washing each vehicle. Kids were scrubbing all over the vehicle, not keeping with my meticulous plan of rinse, wash, rinse over each section from top to bottom, hood then trunk, drivers side then passenger. It’s a method that works, but for the kids it was more about soap suds, getting each other wet and drawing dirt smiley faces on the side of the white van.
Half way through my once enjoyable chore, I was feeling anything but fulfilled or relaxed as I snapped at the kids “don’t wash the car after you drop the sponge in the dirt…stop squirting me with hose…no, you don’t wash the inside of the van”. Then at the point of complete frustration I stop their summer fun, order them to put down their sponges, and go in the house. Now upset, I have ruined my afternoon, the kid’s afternoon, and Charlene is quizzically starring at me in the doorway with that “what’s your problem” look.
Patience is a virtue. Whoever said that must have been single, living in a monastery on remote Himalayan mountain peak. Within all relationships we find that others irritate, frustrate, move too fast, move too slow, get it too quick, too slow or not at all. These relationships are in the home, at work, at church and community (highways, standing in line at the grocery store). Anyone who is a parent of a toddler, child, or teen certainly understands the elusive character trait of patience.
However, God does encourage us that God-given patience (restraint in the face of opposition or oppression) is a distinction of Love. I Corinthians 13, “Love is patient, love is kind”, and as a Fruit of the Spirit working within us, “But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control.” Gal. 5:22 We are called to express patience as brothers/sisters in Christ, Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. Eph. 4:2-3. Regardless of how others make me feel or what others may do, I am compelled to take a deep breath, slow my pulse and trust in God…to be patient. When I express patience toward another, it is divine love working within me and surprisingly I feel a lot better about the situation, the other person and even myself.
Now, as I prepare to wash the cars and one of the kids ask if they can help or wash it themselves, I say "great", and we enthusiastically wash the car. In the end the car still has streaks of dirt down the side, missed areas, and at times scratches, but my enjoyable chore is shared with my child and the vehicle is nearly 82% clean and I feel fulfilled, relaxed and loved.
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